hiking_soul

Recent posts

• Czy Indiana Dunes zasługuje na miano Parku Narodowego, skoro nie ma tam czego zauważyć?

  Nie mam nic do Indiana Dunes. Wkurza mnie, że nazywa się Parkiem Narodowym. Pewnie ktoś musiał dać Park Narodowy stanowi Indiana, żeby każdy stan poczuł się doceniony. Słyszysz „park narodowy” i mózg zaczyna szykować się na coś mitycznego: strzeliste góry, prastare lasy, krajobrazy, które na zawsze zmieniają twój stosunek do geologii, Boga i samego siebie. A potem przyjeżdżasz i orientujesz się, że jesteś na całkiem przyzwoitej plaży pod Gary w stanie Indiana.

• Petrified Forest'ın adı “İçinde kütükler olan sıkıcı çöl” olarak mı değiştirilmeli?

  Bu sefer yüksek beklentilerim tamamen benim kabahatim. Belki sen beklentilerini düşük tutarsan beğenirsin. “taşlaşmış orman” diye bir şey duydum ve karanlık bir fantastik filmden çıkmışçasına yerinde donup kalmış kadim bir taş orman hayal ettim. Gitmeden önce fotoğraflarına baktım ama bunun gibi görünüyorlardı...

• Yellowstone, ça vaut le coup d'y aller — mais faut-il vraiment rappeler de ne pas toucher aux bisons ?

  Bon, Yellowstone est objectivement incroyable. Le paysage est dément : bassins fumants aux couleurs d'arc-en-ciel, geysers qui jaillissent de nulle part, troupeaux de bisons errant dans la brume comme dans la scène d'ouverture d'un film de fantasy. Mais l'expérience réelle de la visite de Yellowstone consiste surtout à se faire ordonner avec insistance de ne pas faire certaines choses.

• Ist der Grand Canyon überbewertet?

  Sieht exakt aus wie auf den Fotos. Super, jetzt hast du es gesehen. Ich bestreite nicht, dass es beeindruckend ist. Es ist offensichtlich beeindruckend. Da steht sogar eine Tafel, die im Grunde zugibt: „Okay, schon gut, in keiner messbaren Kategorie ist es der größte Canyon der Welt, aber spirituell? Emotional? Von den Vibes her? Da ist es der grandioseste.“ Klar. Warum nicht.

• La Mammoth Cave è così brava a fare la grotta da risultare, alla fine, un po' noiosa?

  È enorme. Storicamente importante. Geologicamente affascinante. E anche, in qualche modo, un po' noiosa. Le stesse caratteristiche che la rendono il sistema di grotte più lungo del mondo fanno anche sembrare ampie sezioni come se qualcuno avesse scavato un parcheggio sotterraneo di un edificio pubblico. Ci sono sistemi di grotte negli Appalachi che sembrano usciti da un romanzo fantasy. La Mammoth sembra spesso un tunnel della metropolitana mai finito.

• Saguaro cuma cocok buatmu kalau kamu satu-satunya orang yang suka kaktus?

  Saguaro National Park pada dasarnya adalah beberapa jam berkendara berputar-putar sambil menatap satu tanaman yang luar biasa keras kepala. Keras kepala untuk bertahan hidup di tempat yang tanaman lain saja menyerah dan manusia jelas tak seharusnya berpikir untuk tinggal. Tapi memang begitulah Arizona seluruhnya. Dan harus diakui, saguaro itu mengesankan. Ukurannya raksasa. Beberapa di antaranya berumur dua ratus tahun. Tapi lama-kelamaan otak mulai memasukkan semuanya ke folder mental yang sama

• Di Sequoia Park, benarkah "ukuran memang menentukan"?

  Begini, pohon-pohonnya raksasa. Harus diakui. Ukurannya benar-benar raksasa. Pertama kali melihat sequoia raksasa, persepsimu soal skala benar-benar dikacaukan. Kamu merasa kecil dengan cara yang bermakna, nyaris spiritual, seolah sejenak diingatkan bahwa manusia pada dasarnya cuma semut hiasan yang punya pendapat.

• Rocky Mountain merită vizitat... dar numai în timpul pandemiilor?

  Parcul Național Rocky Mountain e superb în același fel în care e superb un demo de televizor 4K. Totul arată fals. Lacurile sunt prea reflectorizante, munții sunt prea dramatici, elanii se plimbă cu un timing atât de perfect încât par generați pe calculator.

• Magaling ba talaga ang Smoky Mountains para sa karting?

  Maganda ang Great Smoky Mountains National Park. Mga kagubatan, bundok, talon, ulap na lumulutang sa mga puno, mga black bear na gumagala na parang medyo walang trabaho. Maganda. Maganda lang naman.Ang Smokies ay malamang ang pinaka-“default settings” na national park sa America. Kung papipiliin mong gumuhit ng kalikasan ang isang bata, aksidente nilang muling lilikhain ang lugar na ito: bundok, puno, batis, baka may maliit na cabin sa kung saan.

• Có phải Mammoth Cave chán chính vì nó quá thành công trong việc làm một cái hang?

  Nó khổng lồ. Quan trọng về mặt lịch sử. Hấp dẫn về mặt địa chất. Mà bằng cách nào đó cũng hơi chán. Chính những đặc điểm khiến nó là hệ thống hang dài nhất thế giới cũng làm nhiều đoạn của nó trông như có ai đó khoét một bãi đậu xe của cơ quan nhà nước xuống dưới lòng đất. Có những hệ thống hang ở Appalachia trông như bước ra từ tiểu thuyết giả tưởng. Mammoth thì thường trông như một đường hầm tàu điện ngầm xây dở.

• Czy w Denali im więcej idziesz, tym bardziej stoisz w miejscu?

  Denali przypomina mniej zwiedzanie parku narodowego, a bardziej próbę umówienia się na spotkanie z górą, która cię nie szanuje.Po pierwsze, jest spora szansa, że góry w ogóle nie zobaczysz. Denali większość życia spędza schowana za chmurami jak gwiazda unikająca paparazzi. To my jesteśmy paparazzi. Ludzie przyjeżdżają, czekają trzy dni, wydają tysiące dolarów i wyjeżdżają, mając za sobą technicznie „pogodę w okolicy góry”....

• No Parque Sequoia, tamanho é documento mesmo?

  Olha, as árvores são gigantes. Crédito a quem merece. São extremamente gigantes. A primeira vez que você vê uma sequoia gigante, ela genuinamente mexe com sua noção de escala. Você se sente pequeno de um jeito significativo, quase espiritual, como se tivesse sido lembrado por um instante de que seres humanos são basicamente formigas decorativas com opiniões.

• Il Rocky Mountain vale davvero la visita solo durante le pandemie?

  Il Rocky Mountain National Park è splendido nello stesso modo in cui è splendida una demo di un televisore 4K. Tutto sembra finto. I laghi sono troppo riflettenti, le montagne troppo drammatiche, gli alci si aggirano con un tempismo così perfetto da sembrare generati al computer.

• L'Indiana Dunes merita davvero di chiamarsi Parco Nazionale, se non c'è nulla di cui accorgersi?

  Non è che l'Indiana Dunes mi stia antipatico. Mi dà fastidio che si definisca Parco Nazionale. Immagino che qualcuno dovesse dare un parco nazionale anche all'Indiana, così ogni stato si sente incluso. Senti "parco nazionale" e il cervello inizia a prepararsi a qualcosa di mitico: montagne imponenti, foreste antiche, paesaggi che cambiano radicalmente il tuo rapporto con la geologia, con Dio e con te stesso. Poi arrivi e ti rendi conto di essere su una spiaggia discretamente carina vicino a Gary

• Grand Canyon có đáng đi không, khi nó trông y hệt trong hình?

  Nó trông y hệt trong hình. Tuyệt, vậy là bạn đã thấy nó rồi đó. Tôi không phủ nhận là nó ấn tượng. Rõ ràng là ấn tượng. Ở đó thậm chí còn có một tấm biển về cơ bản thừa nhận: “Được rồi, đồng ý, nó không phải hẻm núi lớn nhất thế giới ở bất kỳ tiêu chí đo được nào, nhưng về mặt tâm linh? Cảm xúc? Về vibe? Thì nó vĩ đại nhất.” Ừ thì. Sao cũng được.

• क्या Joshua Tree सिर्फ़ Los Angeles वालों का रेगिस्तानी अध्यात्म बनकर रह गया है?

  Joshua Tree किसी national park से कम और ऐसी जगह से ज़्यादा लगता है जहाँ किसी का ex “ख़ुद को ढूँढने” के लिए शिफ़्ट हो गया हो। यहाँ का नज़ारा बिल्कुल वैसा दिखता है जैसा तब होता है जब किसी रेगिस्तान की वो राय बन जाए जिनका cancel culture से पहले मज़ाक़ उड़ाया जाता था। अजीब टेढ़े-मेढ़े पेड़। ऐसे कोणों पर संतुलित बड़े-बड़े गोल पत्थरों के ढेर जो Instagram पर cool दिखते हैं। पार्क का हर कोना या तो किसी U2 album cover जैसा लगता है या किसी महँगे skincare ad के background जैसा।

• Panget nga ba talaga ang Grand Canyon?

  Mukha itong eksakto sa mga litrato. Ayos, nakita mo na. Hindi ko sinasabing hindi ito impressive. Halatang impressive. May plaque pa nga doon na halos umaamin: “Sige, fine, hindi naman ito ang pinakamalaking canyon sa mundo sa kahit anong masusukat na kategorya, pero spiritually? Emotionally? Vibes-wise? Ito ang pinaka-grand.” Sige. Bakit hindi.

• Có phải Rocky Mountain chỉ đáng ghé... trong mùa đại dịch?

  Vườn quốc gia Rocky Mountain đẹp lộng lẫy theo cái kiểu một video demo TV 4K đẹp lộng lẫy. Mọi thứ trông như giả. Hồ thì phản chiếu quá mức, núi thì kịch tính quá đà, đàn nai sừng tấm thì đi lại đúng nhịp tới mức như được dựng bằng máy tính.

• Joshua Tree có phải chỉ là thứ tâm linh sa mạc dành cho dân Los Angeles?

  Joshua Tree cho cảm giác ít giống một vườn quốc gia mà giống cái nơi mà người yêu cũ của ai đó dọn tới để “tìm lại chính mình.” Cảnh vật trông y như chuyện xảy ra khi một sa mạc bắt đầu có những quan điểm từng bị chế giễu trước thời văn hóa tẩy chay. Mấy cái cây vặn vẹo kỳ dị. Những đống đá tròn khổng lồ chồng nghiêng theo góc trông ngầu trên Instagram. Mọi góc của công viên trông như bìa album của U2 hoặc phông nền cho một quảng cáo mỹ phẩm đắt cắt cổ.

• Denali : plus on marche, plus on reste sur place ?

  Denali, ça ressemble moins à la visite d'un parc national qu'à une tentative de prendre rendez-vous avec une montagne qui ne vous respecte pas. D'abord, il y a de très fortes chances que vous ne voyiez tout simplement pas la montagne. Denali passe le plus clair de sa vie cachée derrière les nuages, comme une célébrité qui évite les paparazzis. Les paparazzis, c'est nous. Des gens viennent, attendent trois jours, dépensent des milliers de dollars…

• Arches có đáng để quay lại một lần nữa không?

  Arches thì cũng ổn thôi. Nó đúng như những gì nó hứa hẹn: có mấy cái vòm đá. Bạn chắc chắn sẽ thấy thứ mình tìm, bạn và hàng nghìn người khác. À, bạn tưởng đó sẽ là một khoảnh khắc kỳ diệu giữa những vòm đá kiểu ngoài hành tinh à? Nghĩ lại đi.

• OK lang ba ang Yellowstone kung puro pagbabawal na lang naman ang aabutin mo doon (at 'wag mong hahawakan ang byson)?

  Tingnan mo, objectively kahanga-hanga ang Yellowstone. Baliw ang tanawin: umuusok na rainbow-colored na mga pool, mga geyser na sumasabog kung saan-saan, kawan ng bison na gumagala sa hamog na parang opening scene ng isang fantasy movie. Pero ang aktwal na karanasan ng pagpunta sa Yellowstone ay halos puro pagsusumigaw lang ng utos na huwag kang gumawa ng kahit ano.

• Grand Canyon itu payah — atau cuma vibes yang bikin orang terkesan?

  Tampilannya persis seperti di foto. Bagus, sekarang kamu sudah melihatnya. Aku tidak menyangkal ini mengesankan. Jelas mengesankan. Bahkan ada plakat di sana yang pada dasarnya mengakui: “Oke, baiklah, ini bukan ngarai terbesar di dunia dalam kategori apa pun yang bisa diukur, tapi secara spiritual? Secara emosional? Secara vibes? Inilah yang paling agung.” Ya sudah. Kenapa tidak.

• Sa Sequoia Park, totoo bang "size does matter"?

  Tingnan mo, malalaki nga ang mga puno. Bigyan natin ng kredito. Sobrang lalaki nila. Sa unang pagkakita mo ng giant sequoia, talagang naguguluhan ang pakiramdam mo sa sukat. Nararamdaman mong maliit ka sa makahulugan, halos espirituwal na paraan, parang biglang pinaalala sa'yo na ang mga tao ay basically dekorasyon lang na langgam na may opinyon.

• क्या Yellowstone का असली अनुभव बस यही है कि आपको लगातार हिदायतें दी जाती रहें कि क्या नहीं करना (और bison को मत छूना)?

  देखो, Yellowstone वस्तुनिष्ठ रूप से अद्भुत है। नज़ारा पागलपन भरा है: भाप छोड़ते इंद्रधनुषी रंगों के तालाब, कहीं से भी फूट पड़ने वाले geysers, कोहरे में घूमते bison के झुंड, जैसे किसी fantasy फ़िल्म का पहला दृश्य हो। पर Yellowstone जाने का असली अनुभव ज़्यादातर बस इतना है कि आपको तीखे लहज़े में हिदायतें दी जाती रहती हैं कि क्या-क्या नहीं करना।

• Zion est sublime — alors pourquoi le détesterez-vous quand même ?

  Zion est d'une beauté à fendre le cœur. En photo comme en vrai. Vous arrivez du désert et soudain tout change : falaises vertigineuses, jardins suspendus, rivières, peupliers, lumière du soleil qui rebondit sur la pierre rouge comme si le canyon tout entier avait sa propre lueur intérieure. Ça paraît véritablement biblique. Comme si vous étiez tombé par hasard sur le décor où les prophètes entendent des voix.

• Le parc de Saguaro n'a-t-il d'intérêt que si vous êtes la seule personne à adorer les cactus ?

  Le parc national de Saguaro, c'est en gros plusieurs heures de route à contempler une plante extrêmement déterminée. Déterminée à survivre là où les plantes ne survivent pas et où les humains ne devraient même pas envisager de vivre. Mais ça résume toute l'Arizona. Et il faut l'admettre, les saguaros sont impressionnants. Ils sont énormes. Certains ont deux cents ans. Mais au bout d'un moment, votre cerveau les range tous dans le même dossier mental…

• Je n'ai pas réalisé qu'on était arrivés au parc d'État d'Indiana Dunes parce qu'il n'y avait rien à réaliser

  Je n'ai rien contre Indiana Dunes. Ce qui m'agace, c'est qu'il se proclame parc national. J'imagine qu'il fallait bien donner un parc national à l'Indiana pour que chaque État se sente inclus. Vous entendez « parc national » et votre cerveau commence à se préparer à quelque chose de mythique : montagnes imposantes, forêts ancestrales, paysages qui bouleversent fondamentalement votre rapport à la géologie, à Dieu et à vous-même…

• Sulit pa ba ang Yosemite kung traffic simulator na muna bago mo maabot ang El Capitan?

  Nakakabighani ang Yosemite Valley. Sa kasamaang-palad, traffic simulator din ito. Kalahati ng bisita mo ay gugulin mo sa inutil na pagusad sa likod ng mga rental SUV habang iniiwasan mong masagi ang isang cyclist na nakadamit na parang kalahok sa Tour de France. Tapos sa wakas makababa ka na ng kotse at, oo, sige, hindi kapani-paniwala ang El Capitan at Half Dome. Makikita mo sila, pero HINDI mo aakyatin*

• A Caverna Mammoth sofre por ser bem-sucedida demais em ser uma caverna?

  É enorme. Historicamente importante. Geologicamente fascinante. E ao mesmo tempo meio chata. As mesmas características que a tornam o maior sistema de cavernas do mundo também fazem grandes trechos parecerem que alguém escavou um estacionamento de prédio público debaixo da terra. Tem sistemas de cavernas nos Apalaches que parecem livros de fantasia. A Mammoth muitas vezes parece um túnel de metrô inacabado.

• Por que eu nunca mais voltaria ao Arches?

  O Arches é honestamente ok. Ele entrega exatamente o que promete: tem arcos. Você com certeza recebe o que veio buscar, você e os outros milhares. Ah, você achou que ia ser um momento mágico no meio de arcos alienígenas? Pensa de novo.

• Magaganda man ang Zion, bakit nakakainis pa rin ito?

  Nakakadurog-puso ang ganda ng Zion. Sa mga litrato at sa totoo. Papasok ka mula sa disyerto at bigla, nagbabago ang lahat: matataas na bangin, hanging gardens, mga ilog, cottonwoods, sikat ng araw na tumatalbog sa pulang bato na parang ang buong canyon ay may sariling panloob na ningning. Talagang pakiramdam ay mala-biblikal. Parang aksidente kang napadpad sa lugar kung saan naririnig ng mga propeta ang mga tinig.

• क्या Arches दोबारा कभी जाने लायक़ है?

  Arches सच कहें तो ठीक-ठाक है। जो वादा करता है बिल्कुल वही देता है: यहाँ arches हैं। जो ढूँढने आए हो वो ज़रूर मिलेगा, आपको और बाक़ी हज़ारों लोगों को। ओह, आपको लगा था कि alien जैसी arches के बीच कोई जादुई पल मिलेगा? फिर से सोच लो।

• Is Saguaro just several hours of driving to admire one extremely committed plant?

  Saguaro National Park is basically several hours of driving around looking at one extremely committed plant. Committed to survive where plants don't and humans definitely shouldn't consider living. But that defines all of Arizona. And to be fair, the saguaros are impressive. They’re enormous. Some of them are two hundred years old. But eventually your brain starts categorizing all of them into the same mental folder labeled “big cactus. Look, it's a cactus. Just big and a bit weird

• Is a giant sequoia's size enough to make the whole park worth it?

  Look, the trees are huge. Credit where it’s due. They are extremely huge. The first time you see a giant sequoia, it genuinely messes with your sense of scale. You feel small in a meaningful, almost spiritual way, like you’ve briefly been reminded that human beings are basically decorative ants with opinions.

• Are the Great Smoky Mountains actually great, or just nice?

  Great Smoky Mountains National Park is pleasant. Forests, mountains, waterfalls, fog drifting through the trees, black bears wandering around looking vaguely unemployed. It’s nice. Just nice though.The Smokies are probably the most “default settings” national park in America. If you asked a child to draw nature, they’d accidentally recreate this place: mountains, trees, creeks, maybe a little cabin somewhere.

• Is Denali a national park, or an appointment a mountain refuses to keep?

  Denali feels less like visiting a national park and more like attempting to schedule an appointment with a mountain that does not respect you.First of all, there’s a very high chance you simply won’t see the mountain at all. Denali spends most of its life hiding behind clouds like a celebrity avoiding paparazzi. We're the paparazzi. People will visit, wait three days, spend thousands of dollars, and leave having technically experienced “weather near a mountain.”...

• Is Death Valley just an environmental hazard with signage?

  Death Valley feels less like a national park and more like an environmental hazard with signage. It's in the name and Europeans still book flights to the US to go and die here.

• Yellowstone is incredible, so why can't tourists behave around the bison?

  Look, Yellowstone is objectively incredible. The landscape is insane: steaming rainbow-colored pools, geysers erupting out of nowhere, herds of bison wandering through fog like the opening scene of a fantasy movie. But the actual experience of visiting Yellowstone is mostly just being aggressively instructed not to do things.

• Should Petrified Forest be renamed 'boring desert with logs'?

  This one is entirely my own fault for the high expectations. Maybe, if you lower yours you will like it. I heard “petrified forest” and imagined an ancient stone forest frozen in place like something from a dark fantasy movie. I did see pictures before I went but they looked like this one...

• Is Joshua Tree just desert spirituality for people from Los Angeles?

  Joshua Tree feels less like a national park and more like a place where someone’s ex moved to “find themselves.” The landscape looks exactly like what happens when a desert develops opinions that used to be mocked before cancel culture. Weird twisted trees. Piles of giant round rocks balanced at angles that look cool on Instagram. Every single corner of the park looks like it’s either a U2 album cover or the background of an overpriced skincare ad.

• Is Mammoth Cave too successful at being a cave to be interesting?

  It’s huge. Historically important. Geologically fascinating. Also somehow kind of boring. The same features that make it the longest cave system in the world also make large sections of it look like somebody hollowed out a government parking garage underground. There are cave systems in Appalachia that look like fantasy novels. Mammoth often looks like an unfinished subway tunnel.

• Is Rocky Mountain only worth visiting during a pandemic?

  Rocky Mountain National Park is gorgeous in the same way a 4K television demo is gorgeous. Everything looks fake. The lakes are too reflective, the mountains are too dramatic, the elk wander around with such perfect timing they feel computer-generated.

• Is Yosemite only great because it's in California?

  Yosemite Valley is stunning. Unfortunately, it is also a traffic simulator. You spend half your visit inching forward behind rental SUVs while trying not to sideswipe a cyclist dressed like they’re competing in the Tour de France. Then you finally get out of the car and, yes, okay, El Capitan and Half Dome are unbelievable. You see them, you will NOT climb them*

• Does Indiana Dunes deserve to call itself a National Park?

  I don’t dislike Indiana Dunes. I resent that it calls itself National Park. I guess someone had to give a National Park to Indiana so every state feels included. You hear “national park” and your brain starts preparing for something mythic: towering mountains, ancient forests, landscapes that fundamentally alter your relationship with geology, God and yourself. Then you arrive and realize you are at a reasonably nice beach near Gary, Indiana.

• Zion is genuinely stunning, so why will you still hate visiting?

  Zion is heartbreakingly beautiful. In pictures and in reality. You come in from the desert and suddenly everything changes: towering cliffs, hanging gardens, rivers, cottonwoods, sunlight bouncing off red stone like the entire canyon has its own internal glow. It genuinely feels biblical. Like you accidentally wandered into the location where prophets hear voices.

• Is Arches worth visiting once, let alone twice?

  Arches is honestly fine. It delivers exactly what it promises: there are arches. You definitely get what you seek, you and the thousands others. Oh you thought it was going to be a magical moment in between alien-arches? Think again.

• Is the Grand Canyon actually overrated?

  It looks exactly like the pictures. Great, now you’ve seen it. I’m not denying it’s impressive. It’s obviously impressive. There’s even a plaque there basically admitting: “Okay, fine, it’s not the biggest canyon in the world in any measurable category, but spiritually? Emotionally? Vibes-wise? It’s the grandest.” Sure. Why not.