So is chapter 2 up yet because i need to know if she actually does it
Taking a Turn
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Chapter 1: Taking a Turn
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So is chapter 2 up yet because i need to know if she actually does it
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Chapter 1: Taking a Turn
A slit of summer sun peeked through the curtains and she opened her eyes just enough to feel the dazzling brightness. Holding up slightly with her elbow to take a glance of the clock, she groaned and flopped her head back into the pillow, just 5 more minutes. It was finally weekend, but he told her that he would pick her up for a little ride. All right, really needed to get up otherwise he would ‘complain’ again; she smiled a bit imagining him tapping his index finger on the steering wheel impatiently. She knew he couldn’t wait to show off the new Benz in exchange for what he called ‘papa Audi’. Such a car maniac, never even thinking about all the people riding bicycles and squeezing on buses, she always thought of him as a spoiled brat from a toxic regime.
As a rebellious child grown up in a poor family because of the exploit from communism party in China, she was never a big fan of either his Sir. General father or his military funded business. Regardless, her boyfriend was super good to her, almost never said no to whatever she wanted to do. The only thing he told her he didn’t like was her paying bills for any occasions especially when hanging out with friends. “I am not a housewife or your mistress, will never be” she told him once before. She could tell that he crunched inside but bit his tongue saying nothing.
With some of those thoughts still lingering in her mind, she stretched again in full length and wondered if this would make her growing taller. Giggled about that idea, she jumped off the bed. As a 18 years old, she was slim with pearl alike smooth skin, brownish hair, wide eyes and full lips. Perhaps not a traditional beauty per Chinese standard, she still held high head turning rate wherever she walked by. Looking into the closet, that casual white flowers printed dress seemed appealing. Still battling between sneakers or sandals, she heard short beeps from downstairs. Without looking, she knew it was him since only he would be so ignorant of such quiet weekend morning. She picked a random digit and flipped fingers between sneakers and sandals, ended up with sandals. ‘Doesn’t matter which one actually’, she thought, ‘what really matters is no heels’. ‘Don’t wear high heels, you look like a stork in them’ He whispered to her once before. At that moment, she laughed and scolded him of Chinese shorty genes. He would never admit that he didn’t want her to look taller than him, but she hadn’t worn heels since.
“Hop in” he padded the passenger side as soon as she opened the passenger door. “A real gentleman would have held the door for a lady”, she murmured under her breath and rolled her eyes. Didn’t sense her mood, he started showing her all the shiny new features. “Yes, it is a nice car, shall we go?” She tried to say it softly making sure there was no sign of impatience or annoyance. While keeping chanting about the new car, he zoomed out on the street with tires squelching the asphalt. She leaned her head gently back and watched the trees flying by. After a few minutes of quietness, she heard “Ok, we will wash the car together”. Startled a bit, she stared at him with those dark bright eyes, challenging his seemingly silly idea. “Oh, come on, just have some fun, I promise you will enjoy it”. She lowered her head to look at her delicate hands, rolled her eyes again. Why am I with him? She wondered, if not for that day she lost herself at his made-up party, why should I? A sensation of despise filled up her chest and she deliberately turned her head away. One day, I will have to find a way out of this, she thought absently. He pulled over the car to a car wash, with huge empty space in the middle. Her eyes followed him while he was taking out stuff, without a word. Perhaps he chose to ignore my silence or just too busy with his joy, she felt a bit sad and sorry for him. Finally he opened the passenger door and extended his hand to invite her out. He was apparently flying with happiness, a bit jittery even. She let him leading her to the middle of the empty space and stood there while he sprayed water on his shiny new car. The sun was bright, eye-blindingly bright, she stood there in the little flower-printed dress, with mind lost in thoughts. Then she noticed he was in the car and started the engine. He slowly approached her and started to cycle around her with his window open. His hair was a bit wet but flowed with the breeze and he never took his eyes off her the whole time while she stared back with a small smile. “My girl is so beautiful” he yelled “you are mine, just mine”. Her smile froze and heart sunk cold, without changing facial expression. Yes, it is time, she thought.
Since the car wash day, she had been waiting for this for almost six months and it finally came. Holding the passport with visa to Singapore attached to the third page, her eyes shined with tears inside. I will be free soon, she held that thought and weighed it carefully in her mind. She curled her lips with a little laughter inside her heart at the image of him trying to find her. Keep it cool, she reminded herself a few times. It hadn’t been easy to keep everything under the table and it was a rough ride with her parents for this subject. Apparently he had convinced her parents that he would be the right guy for their daughter, regardless how much they opposed the relationship at the beginning. All efforts and occasional sense of guilt were worth, while she read the visa again carefully to make sure it wasn’t a day dream. She thought about next steps and how she should plan to arrange flights and money to deal with coming unknowns. I will be ok, she felt a wave of nervousness with excitement and took a deep breath, reassuring herself. She put the passport carefully in her purse and zipped it up which was very unusual for her. On the way back home, she touched the pocket containing her passport a few times to make sure it was still there. Quietly opened the front door, she sneaked in her room across the kitchen from her parents’ room. “I hope you got it”, she was a bit startled to hear her father’s voice. “Yes, dad”, she kept her voice calm and tried to be quick with her response. Holding her excitement within, she was somehow saddened by her father’s pause followed by a small sigh. Her dad had been the most dear, although not the most patient, in her heart, she loved and feared him the same time. Hearing his sigh pinched inside and lowered the joy. She closed the door and took a deep breath leaning her head back on it.
Thoughts
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So is chapter 2 up yet because i need to know if she actually does it
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The detail about him not opening the car door and her rolling her eyes at it twice, like she's *keeping track* of the small fails. That said so much.
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I really liked how Chapter 1 slowly builds the feeling that something is off beneath what initially looks like a pretty comfortable relationship. He clearly cares about her and enjoys making her happy, but there’s also this underlying sense that he sees her as something that belongs to him. The “you are mine, just mine” moment really brings that tension to the surface, especially because you can feel her reaction change internally even though she doesn’t show it outwardly.
I also liked that she doesn’t come across as simply hating him. She seems genuinely fond of him at times, laughs at his insecurities, feels a little sorry for him, and recognizes that he’s good to her in many ways. That makes her decision to leave feel much more complicated and human. She isn't escaping some cartoonishly evil man; she's realizing that even a relationship with affection and comfort can still be wrong for her.
And I think the ending works especially well because by the time she gets the visa, you understand that this has been building for a while. Her excitement, nervousness, guilt about her parents, and especially her father's sigh all make the idea of freedom feel bittersweet rather than purely triumphant. The chapter feels like the moment she finally stops wondering whether she should leave and starts thinking about how she's actually going to do it. Looking forward to the next!