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A Stranger in My Own Home

JoaoConstantine
Public 0 conversations 1 thought 37 upvotes 0 downvotes 0 series

I feel old before my time,

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I feel old before my time,

half-loved, worn out, past my prime;

a lonely man with nowhere to roam,

with rust in my heart and no place called home.

The world stopped dead when I learnt how to live,

and since that day, I've had nothing to give;

the streets have changed, the voices have too,

but some part of me still belongs to what I knew.

I spend my nights alone, with nothing to mend,

licking old wounds that refuse to end;

dust-covered scars beneath tired skin,

like forgotten letters no one's reading again.

I flick dead cigarettes onto the pavement below,

watching their embers fade in the cold glow;

each little spark, each grey bit of ash,

feels like a funeral for the man that I was.

I'm a stranger amongst every face in the crowd,

a nameless man beneath voices too loud;

and when I finally make my way back home,

I'm a stranger there too — even when I'm alone.

I'm barely twenty-five, yet I carry a hundred years,

a pocketful of failures, old silences and fears;

the world keeps moving, but I've fallen behind,

like yesterday's ghost in a modern mind.

Perhaps growing old is simply this:

losing the things we once thought we'd miss;

staying awake whilst everything's gone,

and talking to loneliness till the morning comes on.

Thoughts

  • just_curious_tho

    i feel this everywhere. the part about the streets changing but some part of you staying stuck, that hits different.

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